The Love That Will Finally Speak Its Name...

[lwood]

[courtesy of brigidsblest]

At the age of eighty-eight, a woman came out as a lesbian.

She did it in an essay for the "My Turn" section of Newsweek--and they printed it.

-- Lorrie Wood, certified bisexual<sup>*

*</sup> -- a story of how I became certified is a post all its own. For now, the lady speaks her own piece.

Comments

[wolfs-daugher.livejournal.com]

that truly is impressive!

thanks
Sparrow

Can I get certified Straight?

[purplevenus.livejournal.com]

That would be cool, too. I have heard that story, its a good one;)

Re: Can I get certified Straight?

[lwood.livejournal.com]

Hey, that's the default. It'd be like certifying you as a User of Computers. 8-P

-- Lorrie

[ivy]

Wow. Good for her. [writes them a congratulatory letter]

To think I've been wasting my time with these technical certifications! [giggling]

[lwood.livejournal.com]

To think I've been wasting my time with these technical certifications! [giggling]

Well, we weren't expecting to leave with certificates, they just sort of happened as part of the evening.

*boggle*

-- Lorrie

[evilwenchesinc.livejournal.com]

That made me kind of teary-eyed. My great aunt died in the closet.

In a sillier note, can you debug and repair bisexuals now? 'Cause if you can, I know where you can make a lot of.... heh oh nevermind.

[lwood.livejournal.com]

In a sillier note, can you debug and repair bisexuals now? 'Cause if you can, I know where you can make a lot of.... heh oh nevermind.

Pfft. Too much like work, and reinforcing the stereotype of "Anything That Moves". I'm still picky--and some of my requirements are more than passing difficult!

-- Lorrie

[evilwenchesinc.livejournal.com]

MONEY!!! I meant money!!!!!! Like repairing computers!

*dies of embarrassment*

[lwood.livejournal.com]

Well, the original tale is one of a self-certification process and not nearly as interesting as teasing and dragging is.

However, I put it to you: however would one debug and repair bisexuals? Parade pretty, scantily clad persons of all genders past? That, it seems, might be a pleasant pastime...

;)

-- Lorrie

[evilwenchesinc.livejournal.com]

No freakin' clue. I'm mentally bluescreening at the thought.

I do have a really cute story, though. This was what I was thinking of when I snarked you.

friend who has been bi for 10 years but hasn't ever had a girlfriend: So, I got to have lunch with that smoking hot chick I've been drooling over since sophomore year
me: yay!
friend: and her equally smokin' girlfriend.
me: boo.
friend: (a long pause) Girls scare me.
me: Dating girls is like dating boys but with different plumbing and pms. If you haven't gone on a date by the wedding, I'm introducing you to a nice heathen girl.
friend: (slightly horrified look)

[lwood.livejournal.com]

Well, now, I would say relationships with women are different critters than relationships with men--it's more work to keep a woman interested, IME: whereas many a man may be brought back to attention with a well-timed disrobing, none of what might be revealed in such a maneuver is any surprise to a woman, and as such one must use other wiles to maintain interest.

She's right to be scared...but they are awfully fun.

-- Lorrie

[evilwenchesinc.livejournal.com]

I've got to disagree. Yes, there are some fundamental differences, but when you get into the wide range of personalities and types, you're going to get women who won't be able to finish the sentence they were speaking at the sight of a boob, and men who make ya work and want to talk about feelings. So, the only sweeping generalities I could muster for her were plumbing and pms.

She's not yet been warned of the extra difficulty of maintaining a separate and distinct life and personality (No,you may NOT borrow my jeans. I don't care if they *are* cute the way they bag on your hips!! Is that my tank top??!? Gah!), but I think she'll get it.

[lwood.livejournal.com]

So, the only sweeping generalities I could muster for her were plumbing and pms.

You're right--I was having a sexist moment with my broad overgeneralizations and all.

BTW, The Notorious DLP and I now have plane tickets, and will forward you both the itinerary forthwith.

-- Lorrie

[evilwenchesinc.livejournal.com]

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

[lwood.livejournal.com]

Darlin', anything that makes you squee like that is worth doin'. ;)

-- Lorrie

[abhasana.livejournal.com]

That's pretty awesome, and in Newsweek no less. :)

[lwood.livejournal.com]

Ayuh! That's what I thought!

I mean, for a newsweekly, Newsweek is flaming liberal, but it's still mainstream, and so still nice to see.

-- Lorrie